Music montage: Dawson staring at his zany aunt’s painting of him and Joey, Joey staring at a brick wall, Pacey hosing down his boat, “True Love”, Mushroom cut Henry performing a poor man’s Say Anything by holding a sign that says “forgive me” on Jen’s lawn (Jen takes one look and storms inside while Grams gives him the holiest stink-eye I’ve ever seen). Dawson storming past Pacey in the halls at Capeside, Joey awkwardly trying to find a place to sit in the cafeteria (spoiler alert: she sits by herself).
Joey is staring at the brick wall when Dawson comes outside to tell her that he wants her in his life. She says she just wants to paint her wall and he says it is an open invitation.
Cue the credits.
It is the Capeside Regatta 2000! Mamma and Daddy Dawson are discussing the boat race. They had sponsored Pacey in the Regatta, and Momma still wants the publicity, despite baby Dawson’s tantrums.
Dawson takes the flag to Pacey and they act like dicks to each other.
Joey is arguing with her sister because she doesn’t want to make the Regatta people pancakes because it is “humiliating”. Teenagers are weird. Was I that weird? What is embarrassing part of delicious pancakes?
Grams and the kids are making floral bouquets for the winners of the Regatta and all Jen can do is massacre daisies, to find out whether “He loves me.”
Mushroom Cut is still out there with his sign. Grams tells Jen she should forgive him for wanting to get in her pants.
Dawson asks Andie and Jack to borrow their boat so he can race against Pacey and win Joey, and Jack makes this face:
Joey lost (and apparently forgot) the war and is enthusiastically handing is handing out pancakes, and Dawson drops the news that Potter B & B is his sponsor for the sailboat race. WELL THAT COULD BE AWKWARD.
Andie is holed up in her room with her multitude of awards. Will comes to tell her that he got some scholarship. Then Andie rants about Pacey, and Will warns her that she is about to become the sort of person he feels sorry for. About to? He must have missed most of this season and show.
Dawson almost kills Jack on the boat. Mitch comes by and drops a bunch of sailing lingo so we understand that Baby D probs isn’t going to drown.
Pacey sees the sign and Joey apologizes. Pacey is pissy and then Joey doesn’t care and just asks him to talk to Dawson.
Henry follows Jen to the restaurant with his sign, and momma Dawson makes her go forgive him because his pathetic behaviour is bad for business.
Henry takes her up to a rose-petal covered roof to further the apology. They make out.
Pacey calls out Dawson on the boardwalk, asking him what he is trying to prove and suggests Dawson just take a swing. They squabble about who has a better chance with Joey.
Morning: Jen comes home and Grams is pissed that Jen was out all night (i.e. Went back to her slut ways).
Momma Dawson and Daddy Dawson squabble about the race and Daddy wonders if they are ever going to start knocking boots again.
Welcome to the Regatta! There’s lots of sailing set to intense metal(?) music.
Pacey in the lead with Dawson at his heels. Then Dawson decides he will not back down, and Pacey swerves to avoid a crash. Dawson is disqualified for his shenanigans and Pacey comes in last.
Joey, Pacey and Dawson yell at each other and Joey storms off.
Joey cries on the boardwalk. Dawson finds her and has another heart to heart. Joey says all she needs is a friend without an agenda. Dawson agrees so she storms away.
Will is on his way (so soon?), and Pacey tells him not to sleep with his teachers. Will tells him not to give up on true love.
Jen is in her room sulking. Grams comes to her room to give her a dress that she tossed and a lecture on sex and birth control. Jen finally tells her that they didn’t have sex, and Grams is like super happy.
There is a GARBAGE poster behind her. Remember Garbage?
Also, there was a Paula Cole poster. Very meta.
Mamma Dawson is having a seduction party for Dadda Dawson in the restaurant. She says he is more important than business and I take it that is a big deal because they start sucking face.
Joey is back at the ole staring wall and Pacey approaches. They squabble over her loving Dawson and not him. Then he walks away and says he will renew the lease on her wall, and that he understands.
Then he goes back to his boat and wrenches the words True Love off it and throws it into the drink. Pacey, this is exactly what Will just warned you about.
Andie fishes “True Love” out of the water and now she wants to have a heart-to-heart about her not hating him.
Joey comes in through the window and wants to watch ET with Dawson. Because the most comforting words she can hear right now is “I’ll be right here.”
MVA: Defs “You gotta regatta”