I’m Back.

Amazon Prime, y’all!

You know, one day I signed up for Amazon Prime as a 30-day trial thing. Then the fuckers just signed me up on their own and charged me a chunk of change and I was like buzuh? And then I sensibly did nothing about it because free shipping and why bother, etc.

Then one day Amazon Prime showed up on my Apple TV because that’s what happens when you pay for things. I’ve just rewatched Roseanne in its glory and (unlike some shows I could mention) it held up.

But! I had no idea it had Dawson’s Creek. So now I can now resume this recap-fest and hopefully I can finish before AmPri drops the show the way Netflix did those many moons ago.

I’d start now, but it’s nearly 2:00 a.m. Yeah, I like staying up late for no reason whatsoever. It’s when I do my best time wasting.

Stay tuned! And who knows? Maybe I can get Jen back onboard once I get to Jensen Ackles.




Jenn: So… our one and only way to review this show is gone:


Like WTF…

We were so close! 1.5 seasons to go! It was a two-year commitment! I feel robbed.

Jen: We were within a dozen episodes of C.J…

Not like this Netflix… Not like this. Why now?

Netflix may keep us apart... But I'll never stop loving you

Netflix may keep us apart…
But I’ll never stop loving you

Anyway, here is a link that I was going to share when I thought we still had a blog: http://www.buzzfeed.com/alannabennett/he-leased-her-a-wall#.eqQXLz0oAL

Jenn: Omg… The Pacey/Joey plot line. And last we saw, he had buggered off to “paradise” on the boat, dropped Joey flat and then somehow within months they became pals with no romantic resentments. And that’s where we end. IT’S NOT RIGHT! (And like so much else, it doesn’t make sense!)

Where and how do we get our Dawson’s Creek now? I mean, without actually having to buy it? (Because let’s be serious, we’re not doing that).

So we’re, like, on hiatus.

Dawson’s Creek Revisited: Season 5, Episode 5 – “Use Your Disillusion”

Sorry folks. I’m a day late and a dollar short on this one. I got so distracted reading this yesterday that I forgot to watch Dawson’s.

Dawson is continuing to be more adult than the adults, helping his mom cope with the loss of Dada Dawson (I must say, I totally forgot this plot point. My memory of this show is all getting locked in Walmarts and everyone sleeping together and jumping into glimmering bodies of water).

Back at college Joey is making her roommate jog, and then they stop so she can go on a speech about how she needs to make everything perfect for Dawson since he is coming over while grieving.

you still talking?

you still talking?

Some dude shows up on a bike, and I think it is her prof? He wants to tell Joey all about some dead writer and how he gets to go through her papers to see if there is anything amazing that should be published. But surprise the kick off party is during Dawson’s visit and she declines so Dawson won’t get stressed out by being around other humans.

Jen and the tumbleweed are playing guitar and rubbing each other’s shoulders. She invites him to a play and he says no, he has to work. Jen, didn’t you watch the show a few weeks ago? You are just a lay. Then they start making out.

Pacey is in the kitchen, sucking at life as always. The sassy waitress comes in to let them know that she is still pissed she was passed over for chef for having a vagina. Pacey’s boss gives him the night off in exchange for Pacey letting him and the wife go bang on the boat he lives in.

Toby shows up whilst Jack is in the middle of pledge week. Ohh the conflict. On cue a cell phone rings because the frat guys are calling them for some good ole fashioned hazing. They casually name drop HBO like a message in a bottle or suicide note from the show’s writers who clearly know there is a better life out there for them.

Dawson shows up and roommate bolts out of the room with wet toe nails. Joey greets Dawson with a book called “How to deal with your parent’s death”. Subtle.

Jen is a bitch about Jack turning into a pod person and Toby defends him.

Joey smothers Dawson some more and he throws her some side-eye. Then a car flips in the movie and Joey hits the ceiling with horror and guilt. Dawson reassures her and they go to the party.

definitely should not have rented crash

definitely should not have rented crash

Jen and Pacey walk by her sex buddy on what appears to be a date. She wants to go in to murder him and Pacey talks her into going to the play instead. When that doesn’t work he throws her over his shoulder and drags her away.

not work

not work

Jack tells Toby it’s his fault that he got stood up because he doesn’t have a cellphone (He’s afraid of brain tumors…that lad is ahead of his time). Then Jack won’t tell him why he is late out of respect to his fraternity. Then the cell goes off and he’s gotta blow off their date again. Toby says its all good, and goes in for a kiss that doesn’t happen.

Jen is trying to watch Shakespeare after seeing her bf cheat on her. Ha, they are seeing Othello! Of course they are. Jen takes off.

Dawson freaks out in the bathroom at the party.

Jen will NOT wait to be seated.

Jen will NOT wait to be seated.

Jen shows back up to the restaurant and the girl is feeding him whip cream from a spoon. Jen dumps a coffee in his lap, and it turns out that it is his sister (who saw that coming? Everyone.)

Jack’s “brothers” are dissing Toby for coming to visit (“he’s checking up on you, bro!” “Dump the chump.”)

Dawson is freaking out in the kitchen now, and a girl is trying to help him while babbling about her addiction to listerine. Dawson freaks and tells Joey they have to go and runs out breathing heavy. Methinks his avoidant coping strategy is failing him. They make excuses for him and go back to the dorm.

Jen apologizes and wins her man back by offering to do his laundry. (I thought she was the sassy feminist around here?)

Jack explains to Toby why the frat is so important to him (because they want him for him…did he miss the part where they told him they needed a gay guy?)

Pacey meets his boss’ new wife and realizes his idol is a cheater.

Dawson leaves without his book and Jen waits with Toby at the bus station. Jen lectures Jack when he comes home and he tells her that the Dawson’s creek gang is so last season.

Jen takes an I’m sorry basket to Chucky and catches him smooching another lady. (Who saw that coming? Everyone.)

definitely not  his sis

definitely not his sis

Joey talks to roommate girl about Dawson and she wrote a really lovey inscription in the book he pointedly left on her bed.

Dawson drives around looking pensive.

The end.

Dawson’s Creek Revisited: Season 4, Episode 15 – Four Stories

Ok, #spoilers or whatever, but have you guys seen this: http://www.buzzfeed.com/jarettwieselman/dawsons-creek-series-finale-you-never-saw#.plnG074vA0

As not this woman’s son, and a member of #teampacey, I enjoy how pissed his mom was.


Jen and Jack are boarding the bus talking about making babies and a sarcastic teacher is too busy snarking at kids to notice that Joey and Pacey are too busy basking in the afterglow to get on the bus home. A teacher would definitely be fired or at least lynched here in Canada for that kind of crap. Welcome to Capeside where every day is backwards day.

Joey is uncharacteristically silent while I wonder how long it takes for them to get her tucked in to that sheet, all perfect like so it looks more like a ballgown than sweaty hotel bedding.

Between the sheets

Between the sheets

Story # 1 “About last night”

Once they discover they have been left Home alone, Pacey asks if Joey told her big sis about how they took the big leap. (Nope, because that’s creepy?) Pacey keeps talking about taking her virginity and eww. Pacey wants to know how it was and Joey says “nice” and the whole conversation is too much to even put down. Then they bicker, and the conversation comes to whether she is gonna tell Dawson. More bickering. Joey takes off crying.

Pacey follows and she blubbers and is suddenly nice, and tells him she’s glad they did it.

Cool story, bro.

Story # 2 “The big Picture”

Dawson and the Gretch. Grams told Dawson to meet her in film guy’s garage. When they enter she is holding a gun and threatens to use it on Jen (joke is on her, it is not a real gun). Grams is ready to donate all film guy’s stuff to something other than a trash bin. Dawson and Gretch look through his stuff for anything pawnable. They find a script and dishonour the dead by attempting to act it out.

Dawson freaks because five people showed up at the guy’s funeral. Dawson is worried he will turn out the same way, and Gretch reassures him that he will continue to be a genius, but one with friends.

Dawson asks her to take a powder so he can be alone. Some lawyer dude shows up (how tacky, right after the funeral!).

how rude

how rude

He wants to talk to Dawson later that afternoon in his office. Here’s an idea, little buddy. It’s called a telephone and it’s used to make appointments so you don’t have to drive all over town to let people know you would like to see them later.

So, let’s guess the old dude left Dawson all his money?

Story #3 Excess baggage

not this

not this

Jen is at therapy and the music makes you think something goofy and funny will happen, but only her bag gets stuck in the door. Jen is bouncing off the walls and the shrink is not loving it. Then she asks him a bunch of personal questions and knocks his degree off the wall and smashes it (degree not wall). She’s pissed that he isn’t tossing her roses and giving her hugs so she goes to walk out and then he reverse psychologies her, she calls him on it, and then comes back to lay down on his couch.

he is already laughing

he is already laughing

Also, Shrink has a mac!

mac attack

mac attack

Story #4 “Seems like old times”

Dawson and Joey discover that they both decided to go see the same movie alone (what.are.the.odds.). They decide to go somewhere else and talk instead. Turns out the old guy left Dawson enough money to pay his entire college tuition (AND DAMN U.S. TUITION AINT CHEAP). Dawson notices Joey looks different, and now that he mentions it, her cheeks have been super flushed all episode (duh, she lost her virginity, that’s what happens).

Joey is worried she is a bad friend and Dawson is like you are my best friend.

Then they walk around to some jazz music and run into a lady with a million floofy dogs and other cute date-like things. At the end of the night Dawson point blank asks her if she banged Pacey. Then he babbles on about some promise she made that he won’t hold her to (what did she promise? Her cherry?). She goes on a big speech, and ultimately…she lies.

And Dawson makes this face:

it could still be mine

it could still be mine


A brief break from our regularly scheduled reviews to list the main Dawson peep’s Twitter accounts:

https://twitter.com/vancityjax – Joshua Jackson

https://twitter.com/KatieHolmes212 – Katie Holmes

https://twitter.com/vanderjames – James Van Der Beek

https://twitter.com/kevwilliamson – Kevin Williamson

https://twitter.com/meremonroe – Meredith Monroe

https://twitter.com/michellewfans – Michelle Williams’ fan twitter page

I’ve wondered from time to time what the actual people behind this show would think about this blog, but I’m unhip to the ways of Twitter. Anyone want to send a nudge just to see what might happen? Shits and giggles, man.