Dawson’s Creek Revisited: Season 5, Episode 11 – Something Wild

Joey is back at Bess’ house languishing during break. Bess tries to force Joey to go out, and at this exact moment Pacey shows up and offers to drive her back to Boston. Joey grabs her purse and takes off. Apparently she packed nothing for Spring(?) break.

Jen and Dawson drive past Joey and Pacey as they exchange shifts in Capeside. He’s driving her to his house, and this is a first for both of them. Jen is trying to get Dawson to enrol in community college.

Joey talks to Pacey about Dawson ending up with Jen and he tells her to get over it already, making me unsure of how much time we are supposed to think has gone by. Then they talk about her working as a waitress and her grades.

Dawson parks in the middle of his lawn as usual (Where are the bylaws officers in Capeside?)

parking lawn

parking lawn

Mama Dawson is all cool with the Jawson, even though her son’s shirt is on inside out.

Audrey is unexpectedly still on campus. And she needs a job…which Pacey has already mentioned. Convenient. Danny hires her without a glance at her resume because she can put Pacey in his place (surely the cut-out top didn’t hurt either).

peekaboo

peekaboo

The teens offer mama Dawson some sage and unsolicited parenting advice, and then Dawson takes the phone from her when she is discussing a problem at the restaurant because she is incapable of adulting.

Back at school, Joey checks her grades. And is shocked by a series of As. Apparently in the U.S. they don’t update you on your progress throughout the term, because she had no clue. I am also struck by the archaic notion of finding your grades posted on a wall instead of a website. She runs into her Eng lit prof who has the last of her As for her. So she hugs him. Forever.

super appropriate

super appropriate

Pacey gets a promotion to chef, and a 20% raise. AND an envelope full of “c-notes” as a holiday bonus.

Audrey and Joey are out partying. They are scamming on a guy in the band who turns out to be CHARLIE the cheating dandelion. Pacey shows up also. And while they say hello somehow Audrey negotiates her way on stage to sing with the band.

Jen and Mama Dawson install a baby gate, and mama isn’t happy about Jen being all up on his lap. But they unite over wanting Dawson to make something of himself.

Charlie tries to pick up Joey and he sells her a bunch of lines. She flirts back through clenched teeth pretending she doesn’t know who he is. Then dropping the JEN bomb.

flirting

flirting

Jawson bicker on the porch because he doesn’t think someone in her position can give him any advice on his relationship with mama.

Charlie tries to pick up Joey some more by psychoanalyzing her.

Mama Dawson encourages her son to re-leave the nest so he can shack off with Jen.

Audrey wipes the pool table with Pacey and they realize Joey is missing (with the $100 bill he just gave her to get them all drinks). Now she is up singing with the band, and somehow managing to be as nerdy as possible while belting out Cheap Trick.

still a nerdy girl

still a nerdy girl

AND THEN she sucks face with Charlie, so apparently calling her uptight worked.

Jen is waiting for Dawson in his room wearing some very fancy pjs. They make up, probably on account of the sexy attire.

pj party

pj party

Audrey lures Pacey out of the club so Joey will be forced to leave with Charlie.

Jen and Dawson hang out in the buff beside a fireplace and the light of 80 million candles.

Pacey drops Audrey off, and he calls her on not having gone home. Then Audrey kisses him (because of the pact they made to kiss someone).

Charlie tries to take Joey home and she threatens him so he won’t tell anyone what happened and he drives off.

The end.

Dawson’s Creek Revisited: Season 5, Episode 3 – Capeside Revisited

Jen and Joey and gregarious roommate Audrey are hanging in some restaurant. Jen gets a call from Charlie, the new man. She says she answered the booty call because she could use the “snuggle”. Sounds legit. They talk about how Sex and the City they all are (Joey’s a Charlotte—tee hee!).

desperate pop culture reference

desperate pop culture reference

Then Joey goes to the can and sees Pacey working in the kitchen.

As I watch the intro I wonder if the actors were as over this show as the rest of the world was. Like Joey is jogging… you know who jogs? Grown-ups.

Outside the restaurant Jen admits to Joey that she knew Pacey was in town. Guess roommate is still inside dealing with the CHEQUE.

Dawson is sleeping over at Grams’. He’s belly-aching over giving his parents some news about what he is doing with his life.

Jack is playing videogames at some party. There are greek letters on the cup, so I can only guess it’s a frat party. They think he is bidding and from the look on his face it would seem that he had not been planning as much.

Now Pacey is bitching about not being head chef at his brand new restaurant job.

Jen is at the human teddy bear’s house and he wants to suck her face and she wants to bond and hear all about his childhood and stuff. She makes him tell her where he went to high school before she will drop her panties.

Dawson is frolicking in nature looking pensive. Oh wait, it’s his parents’ lawn actually.

Dawson confesses the big secret: he’s dropping out of film school because LA is shit and his friends all went to Boston. Papa Dawson flips and tells Dawson that he is mistaken, he will not be dropping out. Dawson looks stressed and mutters “welcome home” to an empty room.

Audrey tries to communicate with Joey, and Joey just insults her about being a slut. Audrey takes it and heaps on the compliments for some strange reason. I would knock that bitch out, personally.

Jack is opening his fraternity letter thingie, and by the face he makes when the guy says “Am I in or am I out?” you just know he is going to come out to these guys. He confesses, but they are all like d’uh, you are here because we need a token gay.

Jen and fluffy hair discuss how long they could go without banging each other and the stupidest bet on the planet begins.

Leerys yammer on about Dawson’s choice. Dawson says he hopes he never gets too busy living his life to sit around thinking about it… odd that. His dad booked him a ticket back to film school, and is all carpe diem or some shit.

Mama Dawson confesses she wants to have him close again and there is a really schmaltzy scene about how much the family loves each other. I guess they didn’t catch season 1 when mom was doing the weather guy.

happy happy happy

happy happy happy

And I’m getting distracted by how white this guy’s teeth are, and how this is just the perfect snapshot of white privilege.

our son is not awkward at all

our son is not awkward at all

Jen and the dandelion are annoying as fuck still. They get in a fight over subtitles.

Jack says Toby called him “Gay uncle Tom” at the frat and that’s entertaining as he relays all this to good ole Grams.

Jen has her shoes on this guy’s bed as they are unable to find a single common interest aside from getting it on. Since Jen is such a brainy feminist type, this must all be very hard on her.

Joey’s purposeful stride down the dock tells me she knows where to find Pacey. Oh there he is! She wanders up and starts yammering on about the stars. Then Joey interprets a scientific study she has read in a way that clearly indicates that she has less grasp of science than she does of writing.

Dawson is packing a bag, he says goodbye to momma and baby sis, and he hands his dad back the ticket. Dad makes sure Dawson knows he is disappointed in him, and that he loves him and he will always be there for him (my spidey sense are tingling here…something is not right). Too much soft music and Dad standing in the middle of the yard.

Jen and lips-on-legs break into the health centre to steal condoms and Jen realizes he CAN’T READ. Well, I didn’t see that coming. Oh, wait no, never mind he’s just NEARSIGHTED, my bad. I thought he was illiterate, but actually he just wears glasses.

Then they bang on the floor of the health centre.

Jack is talking to frat guys about being gay still.

Pacey is getting schooled on truffles at the restaurant.

Dawson and Joey talk about his big decision to drop out.

Meanwhile Daddy Dawson is driving home singing to the radio and dropping an ice cream cone in his lap

watch the road not your lap

watch the road not your lap

SHIT WATCH OUT THEY GONNA CROAK YOU–

well fuck

well fuck

Dawson’s Creek Revisited: Season 5, Episode 1 – The Bostonians

Joey and Dawson are sucking face… well, that’s unexpected. I guess a lot happens in one episode here in Capeside. Turns out this is Joey’s story being critiqued and what do you know, the girl is a celebrated writer too. Unless you count the dudes in the class who mostly hate her harlequin assignment… which, isn’t fiction but a play-by-play of what happened between her and Dawson.

Yay new opening visuals!

new intro!

new intro!

more new intro

more new intro

Joey is running all over Boston (so we know she is old now because like only 30-somethings run)

old people run

old people run

Dawson calls Joey on his CELLPHONE and his arm looks gigantic to me somehow. Actually, they all look a bit different. Tans?

Dawson, you been workin out?

Dawson, you been workin out?

Jack and Jen are loafing (in New York, presumably?).

Audrey, Joey’s roommate asks her to take off so she can get laid, and all I can notice is how much you can see her spine through a tank and everything.

get the woman a donut

get the woman a donut

Joey takes off to talk to her writing teacher, and apparently all the girls in college are in line to talk to the sexy prof who is legit jumping out the window to get away from them. He ends up walking around with bra-less Joey instead.

Dawson is on set talking to a Type A weirdo at his new internship who thinks he is someone important but then realizes he’s a nobody and is pissed.

Now Jen, Jack and Joey are all together. So, not NY? They are wondering where Pacey is.

Back in the dorm (nice windows), Joey’s roommate wants to talk about sex and Joey is like nope and alienates her pretty quick.

sweet dorm room

sweet dorm room

Turns out Jen knows where Pacey is, and they are having a slurpee together.

The gang goes to the frat party, which is complete with tiki torches and fireworks. Joey gets hit on hard by a classmate who is stalking her. Jack is also getting stalked by the frat, and some dude wants to bang Jen.

Dawson takes a spill and the director makes fun of him and then Dawson tears a strip off him and gets a round of applause before getting fired.

Joey sits on a wall and finally gives in and bonds with her roommate and then leaves Dawson a big long break-up message.

roomie bonding

roomie bonding

Some dude comes up to Jen and she bitches him out for hitting on her before he can even say a word.

Dawson bears his soul to the guy at the gate.

The gang, who I now know is in Boston, talks about how Jen is now in love with Jen and they wake Grams unapologetically.

Back at Joey’s room, a knock at the door. Did Dawson not get her message? The hug for a long time. The end.

Dawson’s Creek Revisited: Season 4, Episode 22 – The Graduate

Time for graduation. In Capeside they apparently have to practice it before the actual ceremony which takes a boring thing and makes it even more boring, which, when you think about it is sort of this show’s M.O.

Joey has to make a big speech which isn’t ready (saving both us and her classmates from enduring it twice). Pacey is in so much danger of flunking he’s not even allowed to attend the practice.

Everyone wants to see Pacey succeed. We are treated to this info from a number of heartfelt convos.

Toby tries to force Jack to call him his bf. Then Toby says “What if she doesn’t like me?” and my whole damn day is ruined because this must be the legendary show where ANDIE COMES BACK.

SOMETIMES THEY COME BACK.

Drue tries to crawl in Jen’s window as I wonder why my teen friends and I didn’t have more ladders. She wraps him in one of Gram’s quilts and they talk about how his parents don’t love him.

Pacey is writing the big exam. He only brought one pencil and breaks it immediately. Teach gives him one, and Pacey goes on a big rant about how no one cares about the slow kids and storms out.

Joey wants to fix it and he tells her to hit the road.

Outta nowhere Bess hands Joey a letter from her dead mom. That strikes me as something that coulda used a bit of stickhandling, no?

AND THERE SHE IS THE DEVIL

You thought I was gone forever

You thought I was gone forever

Whyyyy.

Jack intros Toby as bf, so that’s settled.

Joey takes her letter to Dawson so he can read it.

After a giant sap party we move on to a party for giant saps. Andie rubs in how much fun she had in Italy and it is as annoying as you think it is.

Andie is better than you

Andie is better than you

Pacey’s teacher shows up at his house to offer him a chance to write the test, and to tell him that it is dodos like Pacey that keep him teaching.

Jen and Drue get busted trying to reset the sprinklers to go off during grad. Their punishment is to listen to the principal guy play the cello terribly.

Andie is a bitch to Dawson about his breakup. Then her and Pacey talk forever. He passed high school in case any of you were worried.

Pacey runs into Joey and they make nice and act weird.

Pacey is grinning his face-off at empty grad before taking off to his new job and skipping the ceremony. Meanwhile Joey is bitching at Bess about being late. Bess tackles her with a lipstick again while Jann Arden croons Good Mother in the background.

The Dawsons and their infant prepare to go to grad (they are bringing Dawson’s little sis too, har har). They give him a watch or something else that looks engravable.

Pacey is packing for his boat and his bro is actually being nice.

Joey gives her speech with some female rendition of “fields of gold” in the background (they musta blew the music budget on this one). Then the sprinklers go off. Oh Drue. Everyone is spinny and smiling and slow mo. THE END

Grads

Grads

more grads

more grads

Joey

Joey

Dawson’s Creek Revisited: Season 4, Episode 17 – Admissions

In the Capeside cafeteria, Joey is sharing her secret to staying so slim: she just smells her food instead of eating it.

smell the nourishment

smell the nourishment

Jen then waves the stack of colleges that she and her bestie Jack got into, while Joey still hasn’t heard anything. Joey can’t catch a mouthful, nor can she catch a break, apparently.

Next both Joey and Dawson get notes to call home. They both take calls in parallel and look like they are going to cry (Joey: joy, Dawson: not joy).

CREDITS timed to make us cliffhang on what they both were told.

Joey got in, Dawson didn’t. Joey says it is surreal because stuff like this doesn’t happen to her…well yeah…since you just now applied and got in to college…kinda makes sense. Things like retirement parties just don’t happen to me.

Jen and Jack are picking their joint college. Jen doesn’t want to go back to NY. Shocker.

Joey and Pacey ditch the rest of the day to go look at the letter back at Joey’s house –OH LOOK IT IS BODIE! — Bess is planning a BBQ to celebrate that a Potter actually made it to college even though they live in a house that is a million times nicer than mine.

He's alive!

He’s alive!

Now it is night at Dawson’s. Gretch sucks face with Dawson right in front of his mom. She is one classy, cradle-robbing broad, that Gretch. Gretch tells Dawson to forget college and just use the dead guy’s cash to make his own movies.

Jen is back at therapy trying not to talk about her parents.

Back at Joey Potter celebration BBQ headquarters, Joey gets a letter to inform her she needs $15,000 to go to school. After a quick jaunt to school, Bessie and Joey confirm she will need to come up with that kind of money. HOW IS THERE SCHOOL ON DURING THIS BBQ? Is everyone ditching to come toss back a couple of burgers on the poor family’s dime? Joey is in tears and it is BBQ time! She decides not to tell anyone and they will just have to figure it out when she is still hanging out in Capeside come September.

Jen and Jack spat over nothing (about going to NY obvs).

Gretch asks Pacey how he is handling all this college talk that obviously excludes him. He confesses that he was kinda glad Joey can’t afford to leave him.

Jen and Jack sit on a dock and Jack tells Jen to get back to therapy and work her issues out.

The Dawsons turn up and Dawson’s mom brings a letter to tell him he got in to some other college.

Joey takes off and is crying on her kitchen floor. Dawson finds her, and she tells him and he’s like “There has to be a way around this, it’s just money”. Nice world you live in, Dawson. We don’t all have rich guys croaking and leaving us a windfall.

coping skills

mad coping skills

Ohh then Dawson offers Joey his dead guy money. Joey thinks about it for a good five minutes and then says no. Dawson says that he really wants her to take the money because he has watched her go through so much pain and finally there is something he can do to fix it. UGH. Messiah complex much?

Jen is back at therapy. She says she can’t remember the last time she talked to her Dad…because she was too drunk? I don’t really follow.

Dawson talks to Pacey about the money, zzzzzz.

zzzz-sorry- Now Jen is with Drue, and calls him “Captain A-hole” (natch). She asks him what happened the last night in NY, they drank an assload, and then he starts telling a sex story that involves her mom. Jen gets mad he won’t tell he truth and takes off.

Joey is moping some more.

Drue shows up to tell Jen the truth. They didn’t hook up, Jen and her father called each other names (“slut” and “hypocrite”). She apologizes for being a skank but shoots him down.

Joey arrives to tell Dawson the truth that she slept with Pacey. Super sad face Dawson ensues.

Jen back in therapy and apparently she has been working on some repressed memory to determine whys she hates herself.

THEN Joey has to go confess to Pacey that she lied to Dawson initially about their steamy sex life. HOLD THE PHONE, THAT’S WHY THIS IS CALLED ADMISSIONS – DOUBLE ENTENDRE!

Then Pacey confesses that he was also glad that Joey didn’t get in to school.

Both take the news better than I would.

Jen and Jack are staring at fish because her shrink told her it would help her memory. I think she maybe needs a better therapist.

fishy therapy

fishy therapy

Now Dawson is at Joey’s house to give her a cheque for 15 Gs. They hug for a real long time. She takes the money and Dawson waxes poetic and the music swells. The end.

Dawson’s Creek Revisited: Season 4, Episode 10 – “Self Reliance”

Dawson and Jack are in a greenroom gossiping about his kiss with ole lady Grethchen.

Gretch shows up to “help clean up” even though the mess is long dealt with…which is generally when I make a point of offering to help. They exchange awkward hellos and wish each other a pointed happy holidays. Oh goodie. Tell me this is the Dawson’s Creek Christmas special. This show isn’t nearly syrupy enough. Stick a giant red hat on it.

Credits.

Joey says sarcastic stuff at warp speed to Pacey outside. She says she’s not worried about Dawtchen(?) Gretchson(?) so we can be sure she is.

Jen and Jack are at some gay thing. Apparently Capeside has enough gays to fill a bar. Jen wore a bandana so she will fit in with the les-folk.

Wut, I always look like this

Wut, I always look like this

Dawson is talking to Brooks. The talk about movies or something.

The gays scold Jack for not staging a sit-in when he got fired as a soccer coach for being gay. He gets his panties in a bunch. For a support group these people are sure are fucking hostile.

Joey says angry sarcastic stuff to Pacey in the kitchen and then kicks him out because he didn’t put a toddler to bed. I think the toddler might be her sister’s kid? Then some people want to stay at the B&B. Life sucks.

Gretch and Pacey gossip about the kiss with Dawson.

Joey is cramming for the test that she never studied for because she was too busy not sulking over Dawson kissing the geriatric.

Jen is in the hall trying to force Jack to love the bitchy gay group.

Dawson and old man Brooks talk about films and love triangles. Oh, apparently the film is about the old guy.

Joey says angry sarcastic stuff to Pacey in the kitchen because she’s miserable that she “got a bad grade on a test”. She cries about being so put upon. Gentle piano swells in the background as Pacey tries to talk about Dawson’s adventures in sucking face. She screams about I don’t know…Pacey being better than Dawson? Then storms off.

Next Joey is sarcastic and angry in the sitting room. Pacey, for some reason, continues to take this abuse and Joey pours her heart out.

More gay bitchiness. This time at a bowling alley.

More filming the old guy having opinions on things old people have opinions on. Then he tells Dawson he doesn’t give a tinker’s damn about his opinion, and insists on having some bourbon. Then he croaks right there in his chair. Too bad Dawson tuned the camera off already.

Oh, my bad. He just fell asleep.

Getting some zs

Getting some zs

JEN SAYS “BOWLING IS WHACK.” MVA right there for you.

Jack and other gay guy fight over who acts too gay (other gay guy) and who doesn’t act gay enough (Jack).

Joey whines to Dawson about how hard her life is. Dawson says next time let the man-boy you are dating help you, and gives her her Christmas present. SPOILER it is a nice photo of her and Pacey being in love. Then she wants to talk about THE KISS.

Pacey talks to Joey’s teacher to try to get her a re-write (the answer is no).

New gay guy talks to Jack about the gay experience.

Joey’s teacher talks to her about her shitty test score, and teach goes on some big metaphor about relying on other people.

Old guy’s nurse gives Dawson a hard time for tiring out the old guy. Then Dawson forces the old guy to beg him to keep doing the film. Then he talks a bunch.

Joey is being nice to Pacey, so obviously he gets suspicious. Then they suck some face and then study by the fireplace (being poor is super hard).

WUT is happening

WUT is happening

Dawson stalks Gretch and asks if she likes gambling and then confesses his undying love. Then they stare at a giant Christmas tree. The end.

Dawson’s Creek Revisited: Season 4, Episode 4 – Future Tense

“I’m bored” these are the first words in this episode, and they are the only ones that we need, aren’t they? Joey and Pacey are supposed to be studying. Instead he goes through her mail. Apparently word of the scrappy young underdog has gotten out and colleges are all sending Joey junk mail. Guess how many Pacey got? (He got zero).

WHY IS ANDIE STILL HERE WTF IS HAPPENING?

SATAN

SATAN

There are a bunch of clips of the kids talking about the college application process.

not feeling this hair

not feeling this hair

Rich guy from the yacht club apparently also goes to Capeside, and knew Jen in New York. Small world. I think his name is Drew.

Pacey’s curly sis is applying to be a bartender at the Dawson restaurant in her most professional halter top. And after one question about her availability she has the job. It is this attention to the highest standard that will ensure the success of this fine establishment.

business casual

business casual

At football practice Jack takes a giant spill and next day he is in the hall in a sling. Everyone keeps coming by to wish Jen a happy birthday. It is not her birthday.

Joey is crying to her sister’s shoulder because she is only fourth in her class. She can’t cry on Pacey’s because he will be lucky to even graduate.

Classic from the locker shot. Jen finds out the Drew is behind her fake birthday. He wanted an excuse to throw a party.

CLASSIC for a reason

CLASSIC for a reason

Andie needles Jack about his applications and says she is glad he is hurt because he can work on his essays.

The Dawson restaurant is slammed. Momma Dawson and baby Dawson gossip about Pacey’s sister, and what she is doing working in a dive like theirs instead of expanding her horizons at college. Then Momma Dawson is upset her baby is applying to schools far away (she thinks it is to run away from Joey).

Joey spills her disappointment with Pacey who laughs the minute after she tells him not to. They call do-over. And she snivels about her imaginary drama and Pacey tunes out because he can’t relate and therefore this is not interesting. Joey stuffs her limp dick in her pants and decides to go to Jen’s fake bday. Pacey comes too.

The house is packed in the way only movie houses are packed at parties (or it is a definite possibility I just didn’t get invited to any good parties).

there are even more people INSIDE

there are even more people INSIDE

Drew calls Joey the grim reaper when all she wants is a beer. Pacey tries to stop her from drinking and she emasculates him and then chugs ‘er.

Then Jen finds Drew by the pool and suggests that they all might be squatting at a house that doesn’t belong to him. Annnnd she’s right. Don’t worry though. No one calls the cops. This is one of many plot points that are introduced and then dropped.

Dawson shows up to let Joey know he has been counting her drinks. She’s had four, and with the amount of bodyfat she has (Zero. She has zero percent. That bitch.) she should prolly be in the ER. Dawson wants to talk like her getting drunk this once is a life-ruining thing (I guess he blanked on his own little karaoke fiasco). She staggers off swigging her 80 proof punch.

L'chaim!

L’chaim!

Joey takes Jen out to the water so she can give her PTSD flashbacks of when she watched a different drunk classmate drown. Joey says they are not even friends. Then smoothes that over with a “just kidding” and a drunken I love you. Jen wants to find out where Drew lives and Joey spills that it is in an apartment with his mom.

Andie is sporting some crimped locks and shows Jack the thoughtful gift of “You too can get into the college of your choice” (Of course she did). Jack cries lady tears because he doesn’t have football anymore and that isn’t great for the gay kid’s popularity ratings.

Andie strolls up to the drunk fest and Jen is about to breeze off leaving Joey to be the next high school funeral.

just call me Abby

just call me Abby

Joey wants to know where they will be in five years. Jen wants to be starting her masters thesis, Andie wants to be in PR and Joey doesn’t know. So they tell her she will graduate from an Ivy League and live in NY and work in a funky SoHo art gallery. They promise to reunite in five years to see if the predictions came true. Makes me wish me and my friends woulda done cool stuff like that. Then I could show them that dreams do come true and I eventually did fulfill my life-long goal of dashing off quick blogs about TV seasons people didn’t even watch when they originally aired.

Back in the party, Pacey is getting busted for playing strip poker. For revenge she decides to join in. So he regains his dignity at the sacrifice of hers and throws her over his shoulder. Drops mic. Walks out.

Yous in trouble, boi

Yous in trouble, boi

Jen and Drew are in an uncannily 16 Candles like set-up and she gets a cake and a present and everything and I gotta make some friends because I can barely scrape that up on my REAL birthday. Oops, turns out the present is Ecstasy, so maybe I’m good.

that's nice

that’s nice

Drew knows Jen hasn’t really changed so he leaves the drugs with her and lets nature take its course. This is not very John Hughes, guys.

Andie finds Jack to apologize for being an insufferable bitch all the time.

At Joey’s house Joey spills that she is thinking about staying in Capeside to be with Pacey. Pacey is like don’t worry, I will follow you wherever you get in because they have McDonald’s everywhere. Pacey drops the L word in a roundabout way. Then they kiss in a really arm-flailing athletic kinda way. Joey sucks up to try to get him to carry her in for some reason. So he carries her over the threshold. Because he is nothing if not her bitch.

Back at the Dawson restaurant it’s just Dawson and Pacey’s sis. He pours his heart out to her. He can see how much Joey loves Pacey and it kills him. Sissy dogs on The Wizard of Oz because it isn’t realistic. She then rewards his outpouring of emotion by refusing to share any personal information.

Fade to black.

…Wait, what did Jen do with those drugs?

MVA—Drunk Joey: Some people like salad dressing on the salad. And some people like it on the side.